What do I want? What do you want?

I have been searching for something

that would really motivates me…


Money has never been a motivation to me.

I’m sitting here looking at things…

Yes, I have so many abilities in so many fields.

I could just make money on anything I choose to do,

but that is not interesting to me…

I have been walking around, listening to people’s thoughts.

Watching their mock ups of what they suppose to do or to be…

I cannot pretend to agree with that world anymore,

a world that makes people feel like little “shit” if they do not have a job,

if they are not making at least $100.000 a year,

or if they do not have the right friends or the perfect weight.

A world that invalidates you

and forces you to take other beingnesses.


And the more exterior I get through my soloing,

the more I find myself foreigner to all these ideas and standards…

So many friends and family ask me if I have found a job yet…

‘I’m making enough to survive’… I answered, and then I paused.

What is survival for a being?

What is survival for me?

And I looked at my whole life, at what I always wanted:

I wanted Spiritual freedom,

the rehabilitation of myself and my abilities.


You would be surprised to know what people consider to be high-speed…

Personally, I got a bit tired to live in a world

where people do not know they have legs

and they could be running at high-speed.

And I mean High Speed.

MiG-25P Foxbat Interceptor Aircraft, Russia. The MiG-25P is an interceptor aircraft for countering air targets in all-weather conditions, by day and by night, and in dense hostile electronic warfare environments. The MiG-25P constitutes a part of the Russian S-155P missile interceptor system. The MiG-25P is produced by RSK MiG, which is based in Moscow and the Sokol Aircraft Manufacturing Plant Joint Stock Company at Nizhni Novgorod in Russia. The MiG-25 fighter series are known by the NATO codename Foxbat and are in service in Russia, Ukraine, Kazakhstan, Azerbaijan, India, Iraq, Algeria, Syria and Libya.



I said High speed!!

something not common on earth


A Space Opera space ship… and this still not the fastest 😀


and that is the why I haven’t been really interested

in flying airplanes recently on the track…

No matter how fast they say they are on earth,

they are practically  not-moving compared

to the one I use to fly back then…


Nothing really exciting…

even the level of ARC you experience on this planet

is very perverted and low…


Suddenly the answer to my question:

I want my spiritual freedom…

Dark matter ring in galaxy cluster Cl 0024+17


I have waited and searched for eons

for something powerful enough

to give me back myself,

that there is no more valuable thing

to do than to work on this.

It is not for anything that I have met Mr Smith,

Elisabeth, Aida and Dave Thomas

that have given me support on my walk through

this powerful journey by giving me strengths and understanding (auditing)…

I have a team.

Mr. Smith at times audits me

when I need another hand, and every single time,

with huge changes and gains.


Yesterday I looked at him and said:

I’m one of the richest people

on this universe,


Free of a deceiving game..

with this tech, I have a diamond in my hands.

I’m getting back to my original purpose.


To me there is nothing more valuable at this moment in time

than moving towards myself (simplicity) and help others to do so.


Elisabeth gave me some advices which I found to be perfect,

and it is now 2 days that I’m auditing 5 sessions a day

and on the top of it I audit others.


I’m so glad I’m out of the traps that would have stopped me

and gotten me to waste this opportunity to use the tech:

the Church and  my ex.

E. was getting extremely upset when I was telling him about the wins he could achieve going up the bridge.

He told me many times he was considered himself already OT (enlightened).


There is certainly some truth on that, but there is so-much-more to it

and that ‘more’ is what prevents us

to be ourself and to use our full potentials.


That addition to our pure self, is what it make us feel successful because we own a land or because we can ride a motocross bike…

It all seem big stuff containing power and action.


In truth this kind of “power” covers weakness and the “motion” is basically motionless.

… If you are strong and humble enough to pursue your path to freedom, you will run into an implant(s) on the track where you are given a fake self, a fake thetan, a sense of awareness, and only than you will truly know what I’m talking about..


and what about if the being, what you call “you”, looking at yourself in the mirror turns out not to be you?


When you restimulate that “you”,

you think you are exterior and powerful,

but, because it is not really you,

you are unable to make your postulates work fully

and it gives you faliures.

It is just rigged to demonstrate, to you the “thetan”,

(you think is the pure static of you, but it is an image of it”)

that you are not so powerful,

you make mistakes and you are doomed to failure.


So this is going to be my path,


… it is a long rewarding walk.


and my man will be somebody that is not afraid

to travel with me long distances…

with the highest definition of speed,

Affinity, Communication and love.

…and it is all real.

I want to acknowledge a few people I’m really proud of

and need to be thanked and acknowledged

for the great work they are doing…

in achieving and/or giving  freedom to others.

Mr Smith, Aida and Dave Thomas,

Elisabeth, and the many people

that since left openly or quietly the Church of $,

have since achieved the State of Clear

and are moving speedily and successfully through their OT levels.

Mitch, Brian, Steven and many others.

I’m proud of all of you.

There is nothing more valuable that this…

you will see in it the next life.


I’m lucky enough to have reality on what you remember

or the gains that you maintain.


You cannot step out of Matrix with only one foot… you have to go the distance!!


Here are some wins:




and before THE END

I would like to introduce to all of you a great man

who has recently gotten his Golden Rod!


Many, after leaving Adolf Miscavige’s Church,

attested the State of Clear,

done the L’s in the Independent field

and are now moving on the OT levels!!

Ron would be proud of all of you!!


we are here to help!!



If you still in the church staff or public and you need help to get out, if you just left and you need help, please call or write to:


e-mail: Silviakusada@gmail.com



Class VI (SHSBC), Class IV C/S and OT 8.



  1. Lots of truth to all what you said.The Church was so interested in Mest because it wanted yours. I then realized that was the game. Well, I see now that is not the game.

  2. nice to meet another pilot 🙂 i knew there was reason i pulled you in lol 🙂 if you ever wanna play battlestar galactica, just know that i’m starbuck lol 🙂

  3. Silvia:

    Thanks for the acknowledgement….you are a very valuable being and you help others every day with your writings…it is a priviledge to be your friend…because you are very special…

    Keep on flying and doing what you do best.

    Lots of love from David and Aida ❤ ❤ ❤

    • Aida, if all the SPs would all be like you we would get the job done Clearing the planet in no time…
      great being and a fantastic auditor!!… no wonder you are out of the Church of $. YOU GET THINGS DONE!!

  4. Another wonderful post! We have such a similar situation. And funny since quitting I am not so interested in making money..I need a better game.

  5. What you want is LOVE. 10 sessions in 2 days on what? I think you sound a little keyed in (sorry for the invalidation). Are you getting pure LRH tech from your C/S? Get back in comm with the world, spend some time walking around and meeting new people. Let yourself fall in love, and all will be well.

    • Jack thank you!
      that would be a perfect advice if I would seek for a temporary relief.
      I feel lucky I was given the choice to choose between the red pill and the blue.
      Taking the blue pill it is not an option to me 😀

      I’m in a journey of truth…

    • hey jack lol,

      is your ta jacked lol. anyway, are you sure that what she wants is LOVE? how do you know she doesn’t already have it?

      boy you just love to tell people what to do huh 🙂 a real man aren’t you. lol.

      i think silvia will skip your eval and inval and continue on with her journey to freedom
      and no i don’t think you’re sorry at all.

      you happen to work for osa by any chance? or maybe lubow?

      and btw, as the matrix goes, that was a fuckin kick ass movie, i loved keanu reeves in, he was hot 🙂

  6. You are amazing

  7. Hi Jack! You are a wonder. you reading all the articles here and have not realised what you realy reading. Where are You? You are not with us yet but, you are seatching for sure other wise you would not be reading the articles above. I am the Elisabeth Silvia mentions in the article. I recomend you read the article “To walk the walk of solo auditor.” in her august section. Keep on reading sooner or later something will happen in your universe and you to will put on your walking shoes and step on the path of knowledge. We are with you. Elizabeth PS: Just for kick why not have ten hours of auditing your self? than make up your mind you like it or not. that we are bunch of lunatics and join the happy group or go for your own way and be happy with that kind love which do not bring any surprises. Do let us know!

  8. Elizabeth, You assume far too much. Now is she on an LRH standard tech program or something else?

    • Jack, I respect people choices…
      Yes, I’m on LRH tech and I’m undoing what Black Scientology has done in the last few years…
      That’s where my troubles come from…
      Much happiness is coming from this Journey and many new real friends I never even dream to meet… all aligned toward very spiritual positive goals, very different goals at times… but pure and positive…

      I do not feel superior, I feel out of place, and I see what I see.
      You do not have to feel superior to see a blind and say that he is blind. He is what he is.
      Sometimes, we feel like black sheeps…
      the truth is we are in the wrong place. It is a blessing to recognize that and get rid of all the invalidations from people that are trying to limit you and break your wings only because they are afraid to fly…

      • Keep in mind what LRH said was the ultimate Black Scientology process that would spin a case: “Look around here and find something you could go out of ARC with.” Good processing will increase ARC with oneself, the environment and others. 🙂

      • Jack, if you are the person I think you are. I know you are a great guy!! and I send you a very big hug!!

      • I love people Jack… greatly!!

      • Hi Silvia,

        You are a great being yourself. I just felt the direction this recent auditing appears to be taking you on looks questionable. Perhaps I misduplicated your blog. Take care.

  9. Silvia, That’s all well and good just remember The Matrix was a movie, and that the real test of any path is the happiness it brings to you. That equates to having a higher havingness (more, not less, ARC for your surroundings and people in it), a greater ability to grant beingness to others (not consider them less than oneself or feel a lack of ARC for them), a higher production level (not unemployed, etc.), more extroversion (not thinking inwardly incessantly about past failures, 2ds, etc.), more in P.T., etc. Good Luck.

  10. Hello, You beautiful Thing You! It is wonderful to be able to explore and walk about, the Universe! I was looking at the pictures you have posted above. And made me wonder, oh, a question here and you know what happens in my universe when a question is asked? Instant assessment of all the data which is available and pronto comes the best answear what ever there is. Now, I can call that good speed. But even higher speed is existing for me it seems, when one cognation have demolished the Implant of all Implants. The Grand Daddy! The one which holds the humans in its grip over period of time which has last it’s meaning as in years. That long, to that extent. And who cares about time any way when we are Infinite? That Cognations had hundreds of other cognations within which have demolished the implant, and mupped up even the tiniest particles with that done, the light came back which flooded the Universe. NEW COG: ON LIGHT!!!: [I been looking for the understanding of and I am not talking here of the same energy as in light bulbs,] Since Mest is energy therefore have colours in every shade from blacks upward, therefore colours which makes the shapes and gives the illusions that there is something [I been looking for the understanding of what is illusions too, now I know] the shapes in colours the MEST holds back or obscure light. When All is as-is-ad the light can finaly flood ones Universe. No more barriers, since barriers, the coloured subsistence is MEST. [ now that is done out of the way, knowing what is light means, illusions, back to speed!] Since I never thought much about speed, now not only understand what is, I am also having a NEW COG. on Power.!!! Fantastic!!! I been looking for the understanding of power just what is and how much we have as Spiritual Beings! If Power which the Spiritual Being Holds could measured, than it would not be The True Power but would belongs to MEST so it would be part of the Bank, only muck up of power which has limitations, barriers. You want to know what is the True Power? Jack, are you with us here? The Answear is simple as everything is when coming down to the basic-basic. KNOWLEDGE IS THE POWER. When the true understanding, the knowledge can erase the huge implant with speed unmimaginable, fraction of the so called “time” that is speed that is “POWER” which each of us has as Infinite. Jack, get some auditing, will you please Dear?

    • Thank you. This response tells me all I need to know.

    • Great article Sylvia!

      Well done on looking to new horizons and using the tools that Ron gave us.

      As Ron said & you said in an earlier article ‘Any auditing is better than no auditing.

      Note to Jack:


      Ron gave us tools for use – to not use them, to me, would be a great disservice to all.

      The effects of any auditing, let alone soloing as an OT, truly cover a much much greater scope than one may realize. The effects on one’s own universe, the physical universe, AND, the universe of OTHERS is not to be underestimated.

      I am positive if you picked cans, reads will occur (and I’m talking ACTUAL reads) – just sitting & ‘thinking’ will produce reads. You can sense it too. You know there is energy (charge)there. This is MEST and part of the game, and , must be audited to move ahead. Even the simplicity of looking at some aspect of life that you do not understand is an ARCx … well, we have the tools … fly 1 🙂

      I would expect any auditor, including solo auditors, to use the tools & tech to release those bits of theta that have been trapped for eons.

  11. What Do I want? My miss understanding to be cleaned Up. I am reading the above question ” Look around here and find something you could go out of ARC with.” Is this question the part of the black stuff or a trick question or I have to go back, back of the class and start all over again? If so, the first question is right than I am sitting in a huge MU about how the question is and was used? Way back my auditor would hit me at the begining of the session. “Do you have on ARC.B?” She hardly ottered the question and the roof would fall on my head. OF course I had on ARC.B. !!!! I had nothing but ARC. B’s!!! I was in the PU. held in there with nothing more than agreements. The MEST Univese is nothing but one Glorious ARC.B For the ribbon to wrap around and to make the bow, invalidations are used, Only one life to live, we are the body, that we are powerless, there is no magic and for the cherry on the top that we die, even go to HEll!! [ Hi gang is this fun, yes. the Hell bit is a wonderful addition in the implant, a light touch..YES, good place as a destination for vacation ? I wonder Why i had so many of the silly believes to as-is. On ARC.B. I should look for one right now, have any body seen my glasses?

  12. Elizabeth you are right.in the church there is a very narrow view of ARC.B. In my 20 years in the church and all the auditing to OT5 only once was I asked for an ARC.B with the environment. Since I have been soloing out considerations I have been finding nothing but ARC.breaks. It took a while to recognize them for what they were
    after a church education. But what is an engram but an ARC.B with MEST.
    Jack, all your protest is just another ARC Break.I suggest you solo it out and you will will feel better with more ability to see things clearly.It is working for me.

  13. Hello PAUL!! it is more than fantastic that you are Clear, and you are tackling the OT levels. On the long run it do not make any different were you are since the path of freedom is not numbered, can not be numbered. The walk is not like a picture to paint by number. once on the path no matter where you are at it is the perfact place to be till you take the next step. Than that is the place which is the right place. Only you will know where is the end what are your goals and dreams you are reaching for. We are here to urge you on and to cheer you! You are never alone!

  14. Hi Peter! My Dear,a voice from Down Under! You right, Jack should be audited and the old ARC question should be used “DO YOU HAVE ON ARC B.?” We are such a wonderful bunch of squirrels ! But we know which nut is poisonous and which one is good to eat. Good appetite you squirrels!

  15. Jack, it was great to have your communication, and any time. How can we not like you? Do e-mail when ever you like! You have no idea how wellcome you are in our universe! long as you dont mind having a bunch of playful spirits gnaw on your bones , but only for fun. If you dont want that than next time before you show up here leave the bones at home. Much love to you. Elizabeth

  16. Well Done Paul!! I love reading the wonderful wins from people doing the Bridge freely and in a safe environment.

    Welcome back!


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