attainment of Knowledge it is a tough but beautiful adventure… with its shiny and rainy days.


“Now, where one or another of us in Scientology

have been injured by somebody else in Scientology—

which is inevitably true—


human beings step on other human beings’ toes.

And you cannot be right and be human.


People then should just simply say—

the friends of this person and enemies alike

simply get together and say,

“Well, let’s see—how can we straighten this out

I think the best thing to do would be

to back up the truck and get it off of her leg ”

Get the idea?


And if we understand that, if we understand that,

we can then do something about it.

The most valuable asset we have, actually,

is our ability to understand, to do the right thing,

to be kind, to be decent.



By L. Ron Hubbard

A lecture given on 3 November 1955


Searching for truth…



As many of you already know, I have been working very hard

on my spiritual progress, which has always been

what I was really interested in all my life.

I have been going through moments of joy and sadness,

while uncovering lies and deceptions typical of these universes.


In the last few months I have achieved a level of spiritual awareness

comparable to the decades of studies I had undergone as a monk in the Tibet,

few hundred years ago…

Levels that you could only achieve by meditating in isolation for years and years.

Yet, our technique gives us the chance

to get there while interacting with the world…


It has its own liability though,

in the fact that by living an everyday life

you get lured into believing and obeying a reality that,

in truth, is an illusion, a trap,

and at times  pulls you back into the “mud”.



I’m looking for something that would give me enough oxygen

to fill up my spiritual ‘lungs’.


I’m searching for something that is worth living for… not as a body,

but as a spiritual being.

I have felt some of that joy when looking at my pcs,

I saw them winning…

walking toward their freedom.



I’m a very powerful being.

I can do very well in everything I decide to do.


There would be no problem to me to become a wealthy artist or writer…

but this would just be another life… as a human.

Nothing I’m really interested in.

It needs to be a fuller game.


Many great men have approached me looking to start a relationship.



I’m really honored and I wish to thank all of them,

but what they might not know, is that I do not follow rules anymore.

Rules of the must be, must have in order to be, must do or not do.

I shine and they come, because they love the glitters,

but then they start telling me and warning me how unpopular something is,

or how better and safer to act another way it could be.


And I smile. Because what they do not feel comfortable with,

is exactly the direction I’m going.



Loyalty, commitment, love, passion and truth is something that

I live and expect above the understanding and reality of the many.

The many who are not ready to love without limit,

or/and to undress themselves of all these identities,

which they did put on (we all did at one point or another)

in the “cold” seasons of their lives.



Peeling these identities off one by one,

or sometimes thousands by thousands,

at one point will live “you”.


It is what we call TR0.

A being that is able to be there and perceive…

Not “thinking”, which is introversion, but perceive…

which is an out-flow, an extroversion!

There is no past, present of future in just being.


“Thinking is a substitution for an ability to predict.”

LRH 2nd ACC 21A 5312CM11


I do not know why or how come,

but I found many of the laws of this universe do not apply to me.

When I love I love forever…

It does not go away no matter what.

And even in disagreements or past fights,

my love was and is always there stronger than ever…


Many people cannot even duplicate how this could be… or happen.

And so the  games with flows, where one need to let go in order to pull in.

Laws typical of these universes.


Yes, I enjoy very much a good meal, a beautiful building,

sex or other sensations that life can offer,

but these things alone, not imbued by love,

admiration, honesty and aesthetic are just meaningless to me.


I audited a lot over my difficult past years.

I thought I was upset with E. (my ex 2D) for doing what he has done to me.


But yesterday in session I found that not to be true.

He is what he is, and he does what he does,

because he is drowning into his own emotional pain.

No one that is truly doing well could hurt and abuse another to such degree.


But any way, it was not about him.



The person I was deeply upset with, all this time,

it was me and I used him to punish myself.

Him, as the 1.1 perfect weapon.


A many long whiles ago I was into a relationship with a drunk.

After years of abuses he murdered our 2 children and then he killed me.


While stabbing me he was shouting “how worthless I was,

and how much all that was happening was my fault.”


I agreed.

There must have been something very wrong with me

if I did let that happen.

I thought I did not deserve anything but to be punished for that,

this while working hard to rehabilitate myself…


Postulates work… and so I did.


I never stopped studying while, at the same time I made my life pretty miserable

by having around people who could not love me

or accept me for what I was.


Yesterday, when I spotted all these little games,

after so long, I made peace with myself…


I made peace

with one of my worst enemies:




Everything always goes back to flow 0.


If we consider flows:

Flow 1: something that happens to self

Flow 2: something you do to others

Flow 3: Others do to others

Flow 0: something done to self


We can easily observe that is also an awareness scale.

A person in full awareness will probably read mostly on Flow 0.

Because that is the truth.


What is justice after all?

Is something we expect to happen to repair an overt on  flow 0.


It is most of the time;

We lend money to Bill, we do not put anything in writing

and then we complain he does not pay us back.

We let our wife/ husband abuse us,

and then we complain that he/she blows…


The first overt is from us to us,

where we let something not optimum happen…




Let’s remember that there are very, very, very few people in this universe

with a reality on the 10th dynamic (the dynamic of Ethics)

and very, very, very few,

that are even up to be a 1st D (dynamic of self).


If you do not believe me, why do you think LRH

wrote so many volumes on the technology

to handle groups and individuals?

Why did he put rules and policies all over the place?


The need of Justice in a group is proportional

to the responsibility or lack of it

on the part of their members toward themselves or others.

It is a stopgap.

A temporarily solution while the leak or tube needs to be fixed.


It is a beautiful adventure…




good news:


Adolf Miscavige during the last event announced

the construction of a monument

to acknowledge the numerous contributors

to his Real Estate campaign:

The Ideal Orgs.

Just when we thought was everything about HIM!!!


The 3 biggest contributors were chosen

to pose under the monument…




and were given a free T-shirt

to wear for the occasion…



(Please note: the last part of this post was written for entertainment only. We all know T-Shirts are very expensive at this time and not likely to be given for free. :-D)


We are here to help!!

If you are still in the church as staff or as public

and you need help to get out,

if you just left and you need help,

please call or write to:


Silvia  Kusada  e-mail:


Aida Thomas: e-mail:


contact Aida Thomas in private.


Silvia Kusada


Class VI (SHSBC), Class IV C/S and OT 8.


The happy world of the INDEPENDENT as free people!!








  1. Love this post, girl! I have been single now for over 9 years because I realized I had too often compromised my own beingness so I could more easily fit into a relationship. What crap! Now, I take a good hard look at those who would be interested in having a 2D with me, no artifice, no dub in. I ask myself, “Would this really work?” I LOOK, I don’t THINK or LISTEN. After looking at this person, his lifestyle, etc. I usually find that there’s no way a long term relationship would be successful. I want sanity, I want another artist, I want somebody in ethics. I’m also truly happy being single. No other person can make you happy but after some gruesome experiences, the wrong 2D terminal can make you miserable! Enough with the overt motivator sequence! I AM CAUSE. ML, Songbird

  2. to songbird, i totally get what you’re saying, i too had a cog, why minimize my strength and power for some dude? that’s insane. why do i have to go out of valence to cater to him or his case? i did alot of false data stripping on my soulmate journey, and boy did i blow down lol 🙂
    i blew alot of charge lol 🙂 it was a cool journey and i highly recommend it to everyone.

  3. Dear Beloved Fairy. What a wonderful, great win.! The greatest adventure any being can have is to travel on the “Road of Light”. Soon, very soon you will know the reason for your great adventure. It gives me joy to know that you are walking free.

  4. Thank you all, I wish to inspire people to be themselves and while getting there, to realize there is no way we can be ourself without “being” others…

    Lots of love to all of you!!

  5. FANTASTIC!!! I love to hear your wins and realizations. Thank you for sharing them.

    Since I’ve been off the Bridge since ’99 and had walled myself off from anything CofM, I was also denying myself LRH until I got out of confusion through Marty’s blog, earlier this year 2010.

    Of course we can not-is as much as we want, but our postulates stick anyway!!!!

    And to that point, I had to chuckle and am still LOL about just how well my postulates stick, despite all odds in the physical universe – in looking for, finding and buying a house for $50,000 less than when I first noticed it, because I have postulated a low house note so that I have NO money PTPs when I begin auditing again! I made this decision and the physical universe has shifted in remarkable ways (and is still shifting) to comply! I LOL some more!

    Hugggggging you in the Theta universe Silvia!

  6. to tara, that’s awesome, well done 🙂 so where did you buy the house? what state? how much sq footage? how many bedrooms? is there a big yard? and what was the price you paid for it?

    • Kathy, I sent you a friend request on FB. I posted pics. All we have to do now is close and move in! 🙂

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