I have been going through a lot of stuff lately.
I have many times wanted to write,
but I wasnt sure I would have been real to my readers.
When I write that I’m sad, that I feel lonely, that I do not have any real interest in living (meaning this game on this side of the universe), people get instantly worried.
Some of them start thinking that it is not something that an OT 8 should feel, some others try to help me to live better here, some others try to get me involved in a mest game and others show pity (which is the most unwanted and inappropriated thing to do).
I started to look at all this and I realized that all that is perfecty normal from a Mest viewpoint.
After all we have all been well implanted about caring about life, how precious it is
and the horryble thing it is leaving this body by a self-determined choice.
Please do not get me wrong. Look at this from an exterior viewpoint and you might find that the bigger dramatization is to be scared to loose, leave this illusion, or to force somebody into liking it.
LRH says: “Happiness is every step toward the achievement of your own goals”.
People might have to realize that when they are trying to help by postulating and acting in the direction of getting me involved back into this material universe, they are actually counter postulating against my basic goals.
And therefore there is not happiness for me, due to what they consider optimum, but a deep feeling of sadness and entrapment.
Recently I looked at some of the help I was getting… what should be the purpose behind it?
Have an happy life? Start creating and enjoy the moments?
I’m protesting that.
When you are aware of the trap, happiness is only experienced by any improvement of getting out, this is what makes me feel motivated.
When people are trying to show me, how beautiful life is,
they remind me of how it is easy to lose track of reality, from a spiritual viewpoint.
How happy can you be, being a slave?
Once you know you are one?
Do you remember “The Truman Show?”.
That is the way I feel.
And why life SEEMS to go wrong?
Please notice, I used the word SEEMS intentionally.
Because I have becomed a rebel cell in a body where everyone has a specific task to do.
I’m seen as a cancer cell and need to be tamed or expelled.
The “white cells” are runnung in defense of the body.
Spiritually speaking, I never felt better.
Yes, I’m sad, I feel lost at times, but I Know and I discover new truths every day.
Am I interested in building a home, in having a great job, or a lots of people that seem to be my friends?
There is only one things that make me feel alive, anything that does not have to do with going back to sleep.
The search of higher truths and the helping of other seeker to be free is all I care.
This center I’m building is not for me.
It is for people who have waken up, and now they are alone, at times scared and frightened.
Help, true help is increasing awareness as a spirit not as a MEST.
Awareness of MEST is a sleeping pill for a thetan.
It is the pleasant, it is the “going back to sleep and everything will be fine”.
So do not worry about me.
This is the path I choose to walk and I’m walking it no matter what.
We HELP OT’s to GET BACK on the LEVEL
and do what LRH wanted them to do:
The ‘Center of Advanced Spiritual Research and it’s Applications’
is NOW open in Texas and Italy.
We unite spiritual beings
while helping OT’s to live as OTs.
WISH TO CONTINUE YOUR SPIRITUAL PROGRESS?
I’m a Class VI auditor, 2 Flag Internships and an OT7+
and I’m auditing daily on the solo’s upper levels on the OT band.
I’M AVAILABLE TO HELP ANYONE WHO SERIOUSLY WISH
TO ACHIEVE THE STATE OF CLEAR AND OT.
My team and I are available to travel in USA and Europe.
We deliver in English, Spanish and Italian.
Center for Spiritual Research and its applications
ITALIANO/ENGLISH: e-mail: SKusada2010@gmail.com
ESPANOL/ENGLISH: e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org
ITALY: Silvia Kusada/Maurice Pascal
Class VI (SHSBC), Class IV C/S and OT 7+.