The business of choosing meat bodies…

The business of choosing meat bodies…



The other day I was making love to a very special man,

I was looking at him and where few weeks earlier

I was seeing an overweight body

I was now seeing a wonderful, beautiful man.


I have been before with a “model” type and I

remember getting aroused just by looking at him.

But  now that beautiful body was not even

as “beautiful” as the one I was having near

just because the one I had closed by, was pervaded by my love.


There is a point when you meet the spirit (thetan)

and you really get to be in that space and perceive it in his beauty.

It is a beautiful thing

as you are not dealing with temporary emotions,

but with the timeless

feeling of love.

Of course, I have learned by now

that the spiritual universe is very different from the material world.

In some people the love they have inside get expressed as repulsion…

It is what a “baggage” does to the present.

Some truth are perverted as they

enter the material world.

This phenomenon tends to invalidate

our true perceptions of existing love.

Dealing with normal people too often becomes a

nullification game for a being.

I often get compliment on the beauty of my body.

Most of the time,

these compliments puzzle me, especially later

as they remember me I have a body.

They also tell me that most people cannot see me,

they do not know my body it is not me.

It does feel a little bit weird as if you are walking around with your friend,

to realize people just notice is your friend (the body).

They kind of get upset when you

pop up and say,” I’m here too”.

Meat bodies are such a great place to hide for many.

To them it  feels safe.

So when you remind them there is more

by raising your head you make them upset.

You are reminding them they are not their bodies.

You are mean just by the bare fact, that you are being you.

… so you watch them go, again and again. One after the other.

Sometimes you wish they wake up and realize that love does not hurt.

It is the past that hurt.

To be themselves

does not make them a vulnerable target,

just let their true power flow.

I have “lost” another person I loved very much,

as usually happens.

I feel the pain of the loss,

but I knew he would have left long time ago.

Sometimes you wish so much to be seen

and I need to remind myself

that in this place that is a very unpopular wish..


I’m on my way home…


"I stopped and looked at you for a moment when, for the first time, I saw you standing amongst the crowd. I thought I saw in you that light I have been searching since awhile. But after listening to your heart, I realized you did not know of me, for you I was just not existing..."- -- - - "Per un attimo m sono fermata a guardarti quando passandomi vicino ti ho visto. Credevo di aver visto in te quella luce che stavo cercando.Ma dopo averti ascoltato, con un sorriso ti ho lasciato andare." a T. Silvia Kusada 25 Dec 2011




and do what LRH wanted them to do:



The ‘Center of Advanced Spiritual Research and it’s Applications’ is NOW open in Texas and Italy.

We unite spiritual beings

while helping OT’s to live as OTs.




I’m a Class VI auditor, 2 Flag Internships  and an OT7+

and I’m auditing daily on the solo’s upper levels on the OT band.




My team and I are available to travel in USA and Europe.

We deliver in English, Spanish and Italian.

Center for Spiritual Research and its applications



ITALY: Silvia Kusada/Maurice Pascal


Silvia Kusada


Class VI (SHSBC), Class IV C/S and OT 7+.



  1. The acknowledgement of ones existence by others is a very tricky, complicated thing. Beings can only ack you not where you are, but on the level where they are at…no one can see further than the boundaries of their reality……….
    we move on another……… creation flooting freely..

  2. It is a rarity that you find a thetan that truly sees you and duplicates you and vice versa. It is a tone level, it is a case level, it is truly a thetan knowingness. When you find that in another, it is a wonderful find and one that should be cherished.

    For me, it has been a once this lifetime, but I never stop looking.

    • I have found relationships where the duplication was or is almost perfect. But these relationships existed and some exist because the body, the sex is ignored [not in stimulation by consideration] the sex those thoughts do not come into play.
      I have found that with man that friendship is impossible to establish or continue because in their universe the act of sex that role plays or is a high priority overshadows everything else in that relationship. I have given up long time to find that partner, the “Soul Mate” if that concept really would exist and could be find it would be noticeable and general relationships would not be in such horrid state. The most horrendous crimes partners commit against each other by this partners I mean who thought they have found Heaven on Earth at the very beginning in their relationship.

    • Elizabeth, I hear you. My experience was not in the 2D, but as friends.

      • Mine were in general…., I never found a soul mate with man,.,.. not once, not even close…been married 4 times…. bahhhhh……

  3. My two cents: It seems to me it exists a difference between women and man ON A THETA LEVEL (thetans). Although thetans don´t have gender, I feel women in general are producing (wittingly or unwittingly) a really inspiring flow. Man don´t, except they are high quality artists. Its my subjective impression, that the nastiest bitch is actually more inspiring (bringing me uptone and cause me creative impulses), than the most charming man.

    • 1. “ Its my subjective impression, that the nastiest bitch is actually more inspiring (bringing me uptone and cause me creative impulses), than the most charming man.”
      Usually the “Nasty bitch’s ” strong heavy energy flows, that activates your energy flows so you become inspired….. The gentle quiet flow doesn’t move mountains…. That is true…. But when one has erased all the heavy energy flows from ones universe than even the beauty of a simple single flower like a Forget-me-not a will trill one to no end…. And a charming man’s energy flow can tranport one to heaven….. This is my two cent………….
      If you feel evaluated, that is fine since what you have written, was. But you can read about evaluation in my blog…. What is evaluation…..


      • Elizabeth, I do not feel evaluated. I have not spoken about sex-flows. Other man probably do not feel the way I feel therfore I said EXPLICITLY…….its my subjective impression……!
        The only doubts I have is about the translation of “bitch”. There are several translations available and I did not chose a “prostitute”.The term “nasty bitch” is usually considered to be an invalidation but it is not NOT in my comment above, it is rather the end of an dichotomy….something like this…..
        So my comment is nothing else than a hymn on women. 🙂

      • Thank you for the explanation, I know my understanding of English is improving all the time, but I am sure I never will learn all the connected meanings to the words and the underlying-hidden meanings which we all use in expression of one’s reality.

  4. This is a mans world..but it wouldn’t be nothing without a woman..

    • Shaun if I were you I would rephrase that statement of yours… Since what gender and being sexually categorized, meat body has to do with spiritual being, knowledge? If you are talking about agreement, rules and regulations, acceptances who’s doing what, roles being played out as in game conditions because of gender and who is in what position under or on the top….. well you talking implanted material… you are not talking of spiritual where all is equal……. Yes, male bodies in general have more strength, because of the structural mock up…

  5. I have experienced men seeing my body and not me and it repelled me from them. When you have a “hot bod” that’s generally what happens. But, no worries, no more “hot bod” and the problem goes away – mostly! LoL

    • I left staff in ’99 after divorcing my husband as well, and I thought I could never do Scn. and couldn’t hook up with anyone in Scn. because that would cause them to have problems in the church. I disconnected myself completely, thinking I’d catch it next time around. Being Clear and an experienced Grad V is a pretty good place to be for a hiatus till next lifetime.
      So when it came time to find a guy to go out with, I used online dating because I could at least communicate with a man without that body buzz overwhelming him first. I went out with some interesting men that way. It was also very interesting to really see this interest in my body versus interest in me thing in action. I truly believe none could differentiate – except the one I married…

      • Tara, that is good, very good…. I only met one man like that, who have realized he did not love the body but the being the spiritual being….

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