(Valence defined as an assumed personality and the must-do or not-do, need-to-be or not-be (including physical and /or mental conditions), must-have or not-have and all the activities and rules related to that personality. Could be a doctor, a scientist, uncle Joe, a good or a bad mother, Mary, a martyr, the person who loves or hates everyone, the singer or the loser. Anything.)




Today is an amazing day in the field of my spiritual researches.

I have made a discovery which generated a huge grief charge

followed by an indescribable relief.


I woke up feeling upset, I have been feeling sort of upset the last week or so.

I’m upset about failing on confronting the gap of time

between a future, I know of, and the now.


I have been upset with a terminal

which has been so strongly fighting his emotions

to a point of convincing himself he does not have them at all.

Upset about him negatively destroying me with “political correctness.”


I’m upset, because I’m upset about all this.




But today, while I was trimming my beautiful flowers

and changing the water, I suddenly felt happy and motivated.

I told myself “Wow”!

something negative must have disappeared.


It was a second later when I recognized

my happiness was not me,

was the fact that I had shifted on a Valence,

the personality with all the could-have,

should-be of a respected professional woman.

It was my way to win.


Funny game, as you have much better chances to “win”

simply by being you.


The feeling that with that personality I had a place in life,

a game and a bright future.


It wasn’t a win, it was a trap,

as the real win is only an absence of time.


How many times I went into that trap?


I started to cry of joy… OMG!!



 That moment of happiness and motivation from the valence..

and many others were gone.

And I was back into my unmotivated,

boring slow life of co-existence with mine and others,

even slower, meat bodies.

What I’m doing here?

But at least this is me!!

(I’m crying of joy right now)


I’m not playing the valence of a woman body,

the lights and sounds engineer,

the house wife or the girlfriend,

the good or the bad person

the spiritual teacher, the man or the woman.


I’m not playing that.

Every single assumed personality

it is one more analytical mind adding up, we do not need.



A mind who is going to think for us

as is us.


And one day I will be free enough to just

recognize without any mis-emotion

that no matter how much a person loves me,

his assumed identity does not want to be with me

and this identity is protecting its survival by pushing me away.


… This being a friend, a mother, a lover

and many times even being one of the valences

(an assumed identity)  I adopted.

The higher up you go the less valences and the less mass.

Valences are big huge masses full of significances,

but they also have games and havingness

and when you lose one you lose all of the above.


It feels, many times, as a loss, not a win.

This is because we still thinking in terms of matter.


You lose the games, the feeling of feeling alive which a game gives.

You lose something solid you do not need, but you think you do.


You arrive to a point, which is quite high on the emotional scale

in which you start feeling sort of death and unmotivated.

Again, it is not on the bottom, it is high.


It is caused by the fact that you are less and less mass

and less and less involved in any game

at least any game which this material universe can offer to a free spirit.




So, many do not make it on the spiritual journey

because the emptiness gets them back into a Valence

were you have the apparent peace of ‘fitting in’ again.


The valence does the job.


The only way you do not like yourself is if you are looking to yourself

from an assumed identity

and that assumed identity is not looking at yourself,

but at another of your assumed identities

and she is saying “I do not like you!”

You are not what you suppose to be, because, it is me you suppose to be.”

Do you follow?


You cannot look at yourself being yourself…

you have to put something there to look

(spirit do not have mass, space…)

and assume another identity as an external point from were to view

to look at that..

So, today, this boring today

it is so much better than a happy synthetic day of someone

who is played by his valence “me”.

The ‘I’m me’ and the ‘This is how I’m or should be’ valence.

Even the “Things should be this way” it can only be said by a valence.

Are all big lies.



You are everything, potentially.

So me, is always a valence.

and as you go down the scale of emotions,

as it gets more and more solid, self-importance grows.


And people lose proportionally their ability to perceive others,

to empathise.


The big solid me.

I do this because this is how I’m

No, you are not.



A valence is NOT you.


It is an incredible feeling of joy

to be perceived beyond the lies of a material universe.

It gives me, the purest pleasure.


Spring is in the air I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.





and do what LRH wanted them to do:



We unite spiritual beings

while helping OT’s to live as OTs.




I’m a Class VI auditor, 2 Flag Internships  and an OT7+

and I’m auditing daily on the solo’s upper levels on the OT band.




My team and I are available to travel in USA and Europe.

We deliver in English, Spanish and Italian.

Center for Spiritual Research and its applications



ITALY: Silvia Kusada/Maurice Pascal


Silvia Kusada


Class VI (SHSBC), Class IV C/S and OT 7+.



  1. to be or not to be….
    Great cognition… one more bump you have stepped over…., there will be a cognition when you realize, you really realize you cant be even bored because that too is consideration…..If one is in the Now, not in the past and not in the immeginary future than one is in the now.. where boredome do not exist…

    • Very true Eliz, I’m aware of that… working my way up there… every day.
      I’m bless to have you?
      You Aida, Kay, Maurice Pascal, Mr.Smith and few other gems… YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      • little bug.. goes both ways…. i am having quiet days…. contemplating on Happiness since that too is a condition… I have found that interesting since i never thought that it was a cognition and can be soloed on that too…. bloody hell… that to is energy and be as-ised… it was artificial happiness… very interesting item to look at… much all 3 of you…

  2. so very simple, so very potent

  3. wow Sylvia that really resonated with me the whole valence to valence viewpoint and the fact that the spiritual journey is often thwarted or stopped by the fact that the removal of that which is holding us back( the valence) seems to be hurting us more by not having than having . we must relearn how to be infinate and that our groved in materialist viewpoint is but another valence.Thanks for sharing Randy

    • Smiling.. interesting journey, eh?.
      The nicest thing we do not walk alone during this process of rehabilitation.


    • Randy good friend… trust me, infinite do not need to be re-learned… it is very natual being intengible-infinite… nothing to it.hehehe… nothing at all!

  4. Me as Me, Me as Mom, Me as Friend, Me as Activist, Me as Female…it’s really fun staying ME without the pressure of those valences. I’m not always able to just be ME without them. But I really like this win you shared because I can aspire to being more cause over that aspect of MEness. 🙂

    • Isn’t amazing how light everything becomes? Being a mom or else, without the solidity of it.. and without the having-to-be one?
      love to you Tara

    • Hi Tara, you will love every cognition on your levels and before you know it when somebody will ask you who are you? you will draw a blank… no thought will come. no pictures, silent you will repeat the question but there will be no answer…

  5. I’ve been cogniting all afternoon.

    • 😀

    • Please do share , I love cognitions no matter what flavor they are, they are the reason i have written
      endless string of pearls
      The cognition’s are like pearls. Each one is born out of pain and suffering,
      out of mystery, secrets, and darkness.
      Yet how beautiful they are!
      They can vary in momentarily importance before they vanish.
      Yet they remain yours for ever in the form of invisible knowledge.
      The basics are the rarest of all pearls, since only few exist!!!
      They value buy your freedom out of the MEST Universe.
      For your future you have my best, my postulate,
      On endless string of pearls of great beauty.

    • More to the point. As I’ve been striding through life I have been observing all these…let’s call them “things” appearing. They have actually been there for as long as I can recall now. But had always viewed them as a part of the greater Me. Not so at all.

      To quote Elizabeth above, drawing a blank.

Comments RSS TrackBack Identifier URI

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

  • March 2012
    M T W T F S S
    « Feb   Apr »
  • Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

    Join 102 other followers