What if the right guy or girl,

the one you have been dreaming of all you life

finally shows up while your heart still bleeding?



What if you still owing that feeling of commitment

to the guy/girl who after conquering your heart

has thrown it away as it would be a piece of trash?


What about if your true love,

is now telling you the exact same beautiful things

your ex used to tell you?


… It would be so easy to give in to the pain,

so easy to just identify,

easy to run away as fast as you could.


That is what the mind would want you to do,

as true unconditional love,

when grows free,

it is more powerful than the ‘matrix’ itself.



The mind wants you to run away

to not recognize the beauty of infinity.

The matrix:

this big mechanism aimed to produce energy to feed other beings,

to keep alive an external society,

is giving you love where you can’t have it,

making sure you are hurt enough

to push away the right opportunity;

your soul mate.


Don Juan, from Castaneda said:

“A true warrior or knowledge

can experience fear, loss, grief,

but what makes him different from any other being,

is that he does not indulge in it.”

My love for John Y still there,

I think W. knows that as he is a very special unique being

and recognises that true love never ends, only increases.

True love never ends, can only grow bigger and bigger.


So, my love for John still there and always will,

but what it is increasing right now,

what is growing at light speed

is my love for W., the man who touched my soul.


A man in which I recognize

 the attitude of a true warrior.


W. does not succumb to the fear, or the past losses

that hunts you when you are about to touch the power of true love.

True love is there to be taken,

for many.

But only few are blessed with enough courage

and inner power to even touch it.


John uses to tell me

that to him was love at for sight,

that he knew without any benefit of the doubt I was the one.


A true warrior of knowledge never fights his own battles. He does not have battles to fight in the first place, as he does not posses anything. That is what keeps him powerful and free.
A man in fear, no matter how good he looks in his armature, is fighting to collect , to own and /or to prevent the losses. His own losses to happen again. No matter how good his words or deeds seem to be, if you look carefully, they are always carried out to aid this purpose prompted by his weakness.


John, while looking at me told me many times

that I was this incredible opportunity he was not going to miss.

But he did, he thrown it away

he did shut off that beautiful side of himself

which would have brought him the life of a dream,

to go back to a safer ordinary life.

And how many are doing that?

How many stop just at the edge of the canyon because

at the moment to fly free into the beautiful endless sky,

their fear suggest them they might fall.

…and, in order to escape death, they die.


They tuck in their wings so,

when by mistake they turn to look behind their shoulders,

are not there to be seen and they can than pretend

do not exist.


Their wings are not there to remind them,

that they could be flying free.

… and now it is my turn to jump,

and I’m jumping, at times with tears,

but I know that

the most amazing experiences I ever had

all came from one of my jumps into the unknown.


a word from one of my favorite philosophers; J. Krishnamurti


“Truth you have to find out for yourself;

you have to walk the path alone –

and there is no path to truth.

Truth is the vast ocean which has not been charted:

it is fathomless.

You have to find it, walking endlessly,

and the endlessness becomes a torture,

a thing that you are frightened of,

if you have not understood the beginning of what we have been talking about.

Then there is no time;

then you are living so completely in that emptiness

that time has gone and there is only the present,

this active present.


– Collected Works, Vol. XIV,118

by J. Krishnamurti




Some people want to donate me money.

Although the offer is truly appreciate, and money are needed.

I’m not a big fan of donations.

For anyone who wish to help, I’m selling this couple of artist books

of which I’m the author.

It is a series of books called


“Drops of wisdom”.

If you like to buy a copy, of course it would be of great help

to continue my activity of research/help. –

Please e-mail me at: Skusada2010@gmail.com


The first Book is  a compilation of 3 stories ($35 +$ 3.50 S&H)

and the second one is one story ($20+$3.50 S&H)


They have a unique cover  with an autographed original drawing by the artist (me).

The books are enumerated. (1/300)







and do what LRH wanted them to do:



We unite spiritual beings

while helping OT’s to live as OTs.




I’m a Class VI auditor, 2 Flag Internships  

Cl 4 C/S and an OT7+

and I’m auditing daily on the solo’s upper levels on the OT band.




My team and I are available to travel in USA and Europe.

We deliver in English, Spanish and Italian.

Center for Spiritual Research and its applications


ITALIANO/ENGLISH: e-mail: SKusada2010@gmail.com

ESPANOL/ENGLISH: e-mail: dianaclass8@yahoo.com
ITALY: Silvia Kusada/Maurice Pascal


Silvia Kusada


Class VI (SHSBC), Class IV C/S and OT 7+.



  1. What wonderful experiences you have. I’m sooo jealous. To love so much, and to be so loved, what a wonderful thing in life.

  2. I am happy for you or maybe I should say happy with you. 😀

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