There’s NOTHING of our own in our minds.




“They don’t understand that we are like chickens, trapped in a coop, and something alien is eating us…yes, we’re FOOD! (Amy Wallace- My life with Castaneda)


So many times I failed to jump up the stage

to perform my beautiful acts when I had the change,

but perhaps, I never did because deep inside I felt

it wouldn’t made any difference.


If I would have been famous or  totally neglected,

if I had conquered a life of wealth or lived in the skid roads,

if I would have laughed or cried all my life,

I would have still been trapped in this huge prison.


It did not matter to me which position I had inside this big cage,

for I was  just a prisoner:

rich or poor happy or sad.


There was only one thing which I have always been interested in

and that was ESCAPING.


The moments where I felt I was walking that direction

have been the most exciting and

worth of leaving of all.


…”Because the mind is nothing more than this– a foreign installation– it agrees with itself!
None of our questions come from us– they’re all from this thing that possesses your mind. You talk yourself into everything. (Castaneda from Amy Wallace)


Today while I was resting in bed one of my minds

dictated me a beautiful story

an incredible teaching  about life.


I turned to my husband and said:

“I wish I could record my thoughts,

they ‘write’ the most beautiful stories.

Unfortunately, once I try to put this thoughts into words

all their magic disappears together with their simplicity and freshness .”

It was there  I realized, as Castaneda mentioned,

that no creation in this universe is our.

I realized, this life, I have been travelling with few

inorganic companions of which, one is my “writer” mind.

I have been amused by its brilliancy,

its ideas and skillful way to express intricate concept

with disarming simplicity.


Too many times listening to these ‘voices’

which I erroneously thought were ‘me,’

I acted as the  catalysing element to the forming of emotions into people.


I have written stories, I have lectured,

I have painted beautiful pictures,

and while doing that, unknowingly to this very day

I have been an excellent aid to the parasite minds.

Me, who has been fighting for freedom and truth all my life,

have actually worked through art, in its various forms,

to stimulate people into producing the delicious food

our parasite grave for:

energy on the form of emotions.


The very act of living an ordinary life, with its acknowledging birthdays,

with the compliments of a nice dress or a hair cut, a well done business deal of a friend

it has been an act  of support to the enslavers activities.


I have lived a life of a coward,

because despite being aware of living an illusion,

I have been scared to fly free from it.

Today I smile,

I know many of the parasites are unable to feed off me,

but I also know, as Castaneda mentioned,

that “there are a special type of parasites which feed off advanced practitioners.”

That is the liability of having an  ‘I’, no matter how small it is, it is composed of energy,

and till we are associated with energy we are traceable and usable.”

It is a beautiful day for me. I know what I did share today

will totally be discarded by an ordinary mind

(the installed mind).

It happens to me too at times,

to feel this is all a bunch of BS

despite the fact that I have experienced and seen what I write in first person.”

It is what it is,

in this game we call universe.


We need to stop acting upon time,

on which the feeling of defeat, losses and its opposites thrives.

It is interesting to see how these very concepts

are also express  outside the spiritual world.

As a matter of fact I run into an amazing book written by Dale Carnegie:

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living” 

… I still on the second chapter, but what I read up to now it truly worth reading.

the voladores

At the end of his life Carlos had a vision. He saw that there was a form of inorganic life beyond Bobby the Flyer [parasites], called “Seymours” because they ate advanced practitioners who could “see more.”
… He saw that there were more layers of danger than he had imagined. — (Amy Wallace- Sorcerer’s apprentice: My life with Carlos Castaneda- page 182 )


Amy Wallace- Sorcerer’s apprentice: My life with Carlos Castaneda


 “They don’t understand that we are like chickens, trapped in a coop, and something alien is eating us…yes, we’re FOOD! (…) This is a predatory universe, and we are being eaten. ” “Amy, something is eating us, so I’m telling you-forget anthropology!
page 179
Carlos continued his explanation.
“The ego–the ‘I,I,I,’ the ‘me, me, me’–is caused by the flyers eating us.
 (…) Think of the owners of a chicken coop.
They really don’t care for the well-being of the chickens!
They just rise them and eat them–and that’s how the flyers are with us.
If one chicken escapes they don’t waste all their time
chasing it down to bring it back.
A few of us might escape, by doing the magical movements and recapitulation.
(…) “There’s NOTHING of our own in our minds!
The mind, to a seer of energy,, has a pendulum-like, back-and -forth motion–that’s the flyer.
They make us morose, depressive; they fill us with kinky sexual thoughts–all masturbation comes from flyers.
“Because the mind is nothing more than this– a foreign installation-– it agrees with itself!
None of our questions come from us– they’re all from this thing that possesses your mind.  You talk yourself into everything. And everything is flyer, flyer, flayer!
When we think we’re getting to our REAL SELF, that’s just another layer of Bobby the Flayer….
(…) They are installed in the mind between ten and twelve years old.’
“When the flyers took us over, they taught man who you’ve got to fear God, you have to plead and beg for forgiveness, and have to look up to some big entity.  The flyers were especially strong in the Middle Ages, when the Church controlled everything.

From Sorcerer’s Apprentice: my life with Castaneda by Amy Wallace






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  1. Since man first walked upright and stared into the fire and wondered about his life and the meaning of his existence, he has been working out these things that you write about. Very few ever published, and fewer yet are read or remembered. There are a host of paths that people walk in this life and the number is the same as the number of people walking. No one walks another’s path for each creates his path just as he steps.

    I feel for you wrestling with these things, all these “vanities and vexations of spirit” but you and I and all the rest do all we can do and that is both the minimum and the maximum.

    Jesus of Nazareth said, “If any man will come with me, let him first deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.” I read this as metaphor for walking the spiritual walk.

    King Solomon says, ”
    King James Bible
    Preceding Generations Forgotten
    (Job 11:1-20)

    1The words of the Preacher, the son of David, king in Jerusalem.

    2Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity.

    3What profit hath a man of all his labour which he taketh under the sun?

    4One generation passeth away, and another generation cometh: but the earth abideth for ever.

    5The sun also ariseth, and the sun goeth down, and hasteth to his place where he arose.

    6The wind goeth toward the south, and turneth about unto the north; it whirleth about continually, and the wind returneth again according to his circuits.

    7All the rivers run into the sea; yet the sea is not full; unto the place from whence the rivers come, thither they return again.

    8All things are full of labour; man cannot utter it: the eye is not satisfied with seeing, nor the ear filled with hearing.

    9The thing that hath been, it is that which shall be; and that which is done is that which shall be done: and there is no new thing under the sun.

    10Is there any thing whereof it may be said, See, this is new? it hath been already of old time, which was before us.

    11There is no remembrance of former things; neither shall there be any remembrance of things that are to come with those that shall come after.

    With Wisdom Comes Sorrow

    12I the Preacher was king over Israel in Jerusalem. 13And I gave my heart to seek and search out by wisdom concerning all things that are done under heaven: this sore travail hath God given to the sons of man to be exercised therewith. 14I have seen all the works that are done under the sun; and, behold, all is vanity and vexation of spirit. 15That which is crooked cannot be made straight: and that which is wanting cannot be numbered.

    16I communed with mine own heart, saying, Lo, I am come to great estate, and have gotten more wisdom than all they that have been before me in Jerusalem: yea, my heart had great experience of wisdom and knowledge. 17And I gave my heart to know wisdom, and to know madness and folly: I perceived that this also is vexation of spirit. 18For in much wisdom is much grief: and he that increaseth knowledge increaseth sorrow.”

    No, I didn’t go crazy and just paste a bunch of bible verses in your blog – I am just making the point that what you see, the inconsistencies of life, these have been seen for thousands of years and men have worked out what you are working out now. You and I and our friends walking this path of awakening are not alone. Sometimes I think that is our purpose on earth. Not to survive but to awaken. Some of us have more success at this than others. Like rats in a maze running some grand experiment, we struggle and strive and try, and that’s pretty much all we can do. Many people say they want to escape but the price is to leave the self behind and it is that very self that seems to both want to escape and survive and not leave the self behind… hahaha That cracks me up!

    My own research shows me that there is nothing to fear but simply a life to be lived well and happily.

    I spoke with Aida and she said you were well and happy with your new husband and it made me happy to hear that. Peace.

  2. Thank you Chris for this nice post.
    Yes I just read something about Jesus and how close his teaching are to other advanced spiritual practices. It is men who transforms wisdom into rules and doctrines killing the pure essence of truth.

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