Matrix: Understanding the Empath’s code





“Many of the empath’s who came to me as patients and in my workshops feel overwhelmed, fatigue, and downright exhausted before they learn practical skills to help them cope with their sensitivities. They have often been diagnosed with agoraphobia, chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia, migraines, chronic pain, allergies and adrenal fatique (a form of burnout.) On an emotional level, they may experience anxiety, depression, or panic attacks.”  ♦ The empath’s survival guide by Judith Orloff, MD

-IMPORTANT NOTE: Please, do understand, there is no blame or desire of pity in anything written below. That is NOT the point. The intent of this post is purely of analysis and research. REMEMBER, every human form, every valence, race, form has his own code.-

I believe some of us were born with an ability to perceive beyond what most people perceive.


We were called ipersesitives, idealists, emotional. Some of us were punished. Our efforts to set boundaries in order to meet our needs of quiet and peace, were brutally shut.

Only recently as part of my self discovery I researched and found something worth knowing more about.



The Empath’s Survival Guide by Judith Orloff, MD – My profound gratitude goes to my amazing friend Christine, a friend Empath, for acquaintancing  me with this incredible book.




I had my share of trouble while growing up. I hated small talks and suffered in environments where superficiality was ruling.

My protection has always been to be funny. Laughing would take me away from my struggles while giving me a sense of protection toward people. In a way, my extreme jokes, would distance boys and definitely people who were busy defending a ‘cool-image’. The people, among which, I would feel most uncomfortable.

Constantly targeted by a mother who couldn’t stand my demands for transparency, demands which were slamming against her constant hiding and manipulating of people around her,  I was, then, easily punished for “being” myself.

Although my empathic abilities were always there, I wasn’t aware of them until one of my psychopath, sadist significant other, in 2008, strangled me forcing me to brutally face the unbearable pain of my feelings.

I knew my mother used to play this trick on us children. While she was the one stirring the frequent beatings from my violent father, she claimed to be the victim of such violence, gaining sympathy from the majority of us children.

Manipulation from your loved one is a hard and confusing thing for an empath to confront, due to the fact you feel sorry for their after-the-fact “guilt “. Guilt/sorrow they want you to experience while they watch you bleed as the result of their own stabbings.


“Energy vampires with a victim mentality drain empaths with their “The world is against me” attitude. They don’t take responsibility for the problems that happen in their lives. … Empaths often fall into the compassionate caretaker role with “victims,” trying to solve their list of problems.” 
♦ The empath’s survival guide by Judith Orloff, MD


Surrounded by insanity, deception and superficiality, the life of a young, unaware empath, can turn into a real nightmare. My dreams at young age were the proof of my extreme empathic perceptions. The sadistic behavior of my mother toward me in particularly (the one in the family she knew had the potential to see through her although I was just a little child), caused me frequent nightmares were I was painfully murdered, waking up, often, to a very real unbearable pain. If I had a fear in my childhood, it has always been to be interned in a spin-bin, or tortured by a psychopath. Depression, inexplicable migraines and illnesses where a norm till I remained in the family.

Unfortunately, not knowing about your extreme sensitivity, prompted by the never ending desire of a child to be loved and accepted,  you try to adjust, to change in any way you can, in order to become that “normal” which seems to win their love. Love, which for you, for one reason or another, seems always unavailable.

I now recognize, my early search for truth, my painful childhood was what prompted me to undertake a journey of study on the field of spiritual healing.

Mirroring the pain of mankind, I felt the desire to do something to help others. Healing others meant, unconsciously, to heal myself.

Many empaths solved their “survival problems” by alcohol and drugs abuse. I, instead, found in the sexual activity a way to reach, even if briefly, a deeper connection with another human being.

No matter the pain, I never wished to feel less, I always wanted to feel more.


EMPATHY is a beautiful word meaning the ability to feel the joy or pain of another as it is your own.


I always considered, while embracing the developing of telepathy and mind-reading, this ability to to be a gift, although, many times, it has been the cause of extreme discomfort.

After being involved in one too many unhealthy romantic partnerships with narcissists and psychopaths, after been told and made feel guilty, many times, for choosing them, as if they were a punishment for my “bad” deeds (?!?), I finally, discovered those people were not  a punishment at all. Narcissists, sociopath, vampires of energy are very well aware, an Empath, is their best choice to project and play their parasite games.

They know how to use your empathic abilities against yourself especially when you have no clue of what they are about..


“Energy vampires are attracted to the openness and loving heart of empaths. Sensitive people need to be prepared for them.”  ♦ The empath’s survival guide by Judith Orloff, MD

I remember the sadists psychopath, even after he strangled me, after he stole my savings leaving me penniless in the street with my child (he was making nearly 200 thousands a year), after ruining my reputation with lies to common friends to safeguard himself from the truth being disclosed; even after that, he expected me to keep him at the center of the universe. “Somebody is ill-advising her, she never refuses to do what I ask her to do. She does anything for me.“,  I remember his voice through the speakerphone while he was complaining to a friend of mine, about me disregarding his unreasonable demands, and reaching for legal advice’s in order to get back my savings.

Although I have been studying for almost 3 decades counselling procedures and received tons of it through my early affiliation with the Church of $cientology, it wasn’t till I separated from the “cult” that I actually made my major spiritual progresses. Year after year, working on the beauty of silence, egolessness, training myself to listen and to see without the use of the physical senses, by researching and studying many different mystics ans spiritual paths, having been blessed with amazing counselors (those which the Church of $cientology warns you against) I achieved clarity and a deeper understanding of what an Empath is.

Being an Empath, at the contrary of what I use to believe, to be a spiritual condition, is just a type of a program of the Matrix, and for what it is worth, when you dealing with the Matrix, or worse, when you mistakenly but quite commonly, identify yourself with it, it is a blessing to know more about it.

I know some of you suffer of depression. Some other have been labelled with mood disorder, or as bipolar. I have known quite a bit of people convinced this to be true while the truth, as I pointed out to them, is they were full-blown Empaths.

Is worth exploring this possibility.

Although true Empaths are not that many, if you are one, your life could greatly change for the better.


———- ♠ ———- 

Hi Silvia – I enjoyed reading your essay about empaths, of course the area is real to me. You made it public talking about your past and although you already in the past wrote about your abusive relationship here you display the roots. Indeed for a child being in a dramatizing environment the going gets tough. From then patterns are imprinted and it can be rock and roll from one side to a GPM to another.


You write you achieved clarity. I can follow that up in your posts indeed. I’m always curious 😉

On a more pragmatic level – you write the other side of the coin being that sexual activity to bond with another human being, I’m sorry to hear it’s only briefly. The proof being in the pudding, without any erotic connotation – did you after achieving that clarity on the matter as-is it in order to achieve a not brief sexual connection with a real romantic partnership?

I’m only curious, and ask since you made the subject public and thus open

Friendly 😉

Silvia K. answer:
Thank you for your writing. The briefly “refers” to the other party. My connection with people has always been intense and going past the material world. But for the average men, (or women for some men) it is only during the climax where he put down his walls. Fear rules most people into protecting their weakness and vulnerable spots.



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  • November 2018
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