Power is a spiritual quality and it is needed to master strength.

Home is not a place, is everywhere you feel safe and truly loved for YOU, a place where you, a magnificent infinite soul, is seen beyond the appearances of this ‘reality’. Beyond the manifestations of the right of left side.




As I always felt lost, I began my search for a home since I entered this dream, I had an idea of a remote safe place I called home. Little I knew at the time, by considering space, I was holding myself prisoner in the matrix. By considering an outside I was creating an inside. By considering love I was creating hate.

I only recently realize there is no home anywhere else. Home is in the infinite “me” without the ‘me’. Home it is everywhere without the “where”.

But when you forget your true essence you tend, as even the most enlightened do, to begin your search for home. And we tell ourselves we need to be strong; we join activities to build our strength; seminars, schools, sport activities, communities, a family…

What is the best way to build strength than to pretend we are responsible for someone else? Most activities here are just a way to solve out lack of power.

We have so entered in the game the need of effort. And the more we believe in this thing called “me”, the more we focus on building strength, the more we fight again ourselves through the use of effort and the more we lose power.

Power is, in fact, a spiritual quality needed to master strength.




Power increased as we regain our infinite nature. Power is what makes us doubt the ‘game’, the illusion of an non-existing freedom inside this dark room of lies. Power is what makes boundaries disappear, is what gives us back independence from an installed mind.

Spiritual Power is the fuel of awareness.

Power is what it gives us peace and harmony despite what the mind tells us we see, we need to be or do.

And that is power, and power is a spiritual quality.

So, when people in this illusion show off their ‘power’ and do or say things to convince you they are free, strong, successful and independent, you know they have no idea of their true essence. They are lost in a pretense to be a superhero in a cheap superman costume.


spiritual-power effort


When you see a soul hurting others, lying, manipulating, or convincing you of their freedom, power or success, material or spiritual, you know this soul has long lost himself. When you see someone who is trying to convince you, to force help on you, he is not trying to convince you, he is trying to reassure himself. When you notice or feel any type of effort, no matter the objective, you know that soul has lost himself.

He is trying to feel, to prove to himself he has something, when in truth, he has lost everything.

Any side of the game, good or bad lies here. For power has nothing to do with the game of bodies and their illusionary activities.


spiritual power




The path of truth and the change of narrative

Once a spirit agrees to be bound by a body or even worse to be the body, agrees also to the narrative or what is call the program of the mind to him assigned, which produces “reality” without interruption. The mind offers solutions and formulas to give the sensation of causativity to a spiritual being, where causativity was completely lost by the being once he forgot and relinquished its infinite nature.

By infinite nature we mean his original state which does not belong to the illusion, and moreover cannot be understood or comprehended by a limite mind.

Like in the study of history there is something men seems to never learn and that is, no matter which formula he uses, history repeats. Like wise, no matter which formula the being used in the illusion to be cause, he cannot do anything else but to follow the flows and ebb of energy which he calls good and bad, joy and pain etc…

Meditating or any other form of spiritual improvement not supported by the being desire to know truth and reach total spiritual freedom brings about a state of solidity and closes the being in into the world of illusion where even spirituality is mastered and governed by the mind.

Enlightenment is nothing more than the regaining of perception of ones original state, outside this video game called: life. We do not know why or how come some of us have that little opening in the dark cage of unawareness, we only know some of us know something is not right and are moved and pulled by an indescribable force to seek truth and freedom not for the body or to feed the mind (ego) but just for the sake of it.

So, for people like us the world changes as we regain perception of our original state. As we leave the busy theater of life and we regain the seat in the audience, life seems to be getting smoother. In reality the mind as we detach from its game does not recharge from our power. The engine does not receive enough juice to keep going strong, to keep trapping us into the illusion. Therefore things seems going better. In truth nothing is going better. The impulse behind the game remains the same, but being detached by the interpretation of the mind with his little or enormous traps losing power, make it seems less dangerous.

Of course there is nothing dangerous in this game beside the fact that a being surrendered his power to the rules and codes of the program. That is the only real trap. So, searching a solution within the mind solutions would not end the game or would not open up the door of the prison. It would only continue the lies of a life, which in truth does not offer living at all.

The appearance of change, the apparent results or not results of it are, in fact, a trap. And when given our consent to those lies the trap becomes more and more solid. It needs our power and energy to keep going strong as it is.

The creation of goals, our human desires, the planning, dreaming of a different future or reality, and even the concept of God or infinite, when connected to a mind, traps an infinite being.

…And here we see how in this game truth is lies, joy is pain, and freedom is slavery.

Do you want to be free?

Remove the agreement and any desire to play. Simply leave the play, let it continue without your support…. One step at the time, guided by silence. No goals, no thinking, not like or not like…. Any judgment, feeling or explanation which is mind guided does not belong to you.

Now, ask yourself a question: What I’m not willing to let go?


What you do when you ask a question is letting the infinity in you take care of it, of what is needed. The mind does not know, it will never offer you effective solutions because it was created and built to keep you play, to feed the giant battery plant. You cannot do anything effective unless you let the mind out of the equation.


The search of the self

As I enter into the deepest unknown of the mindless trail, as the centennial tree revels themselves as thin sheets of paper, I’m sheading off ideas, rules and aspirations I imposed to myself on my way to freedom. Certainty, explanations, reasons they all blow in the wind as do leaves in a beautiful windy autumn day.

A big business has been made by mystics and manipulators around the subject of premonitions and omens… a brilliant way to control and limit freedom. A big business has been made by ourselves to give us an illusion of wisdom and spiritual or psychic power.

Believing in past lives was one of the many explanations I made mine; it did explain the love, the hate the longing for other worlds or times.

The perception of the future it was another, the so call “magic” goal of those who do not know yet they are infinite. But all and any explanations, reasons, judgments, observations about ourselves or others do, is making the game more solid giving the lead to the artificial intelligence we so proudly call ‘our mind’.

But, along the line, when for one reason or another you able to step down from the stage and seat among the audience, you realize this beautiful terrifying game call life is nothing that a brilliant play you have written prompted by the cheering voices of your ‘best-friends’; the minds.

You have written your play, and everyone scripts. Because you, me we are infinity.

What it appears in front of us is what we want, what we need to make us right and more able, during the incredible crazy path of making a god out of our main actor.

And so we say; “If Joe Blow (our character) can forecast the crash of a plane he has gained mystical or extra perceptional power. He is more close to be god and therefore to be powerful and free.”

I did fall for that many times. I have fallen for those type of things even harder during my time in the Cult of $cientology where, it seemed those ‘mystic’ or ‘extra sensorial’ abilities are wanted and appear to increase greatly. What in truth I found out few days ago is, those “abilities” are nothing but an increase in self-deception.

Castaneda too talks about omens. His followers, some of them, are terrified by what a little thing could mean or bring about. Omens have been a long way to control people, to give them false hopes and limitations.

However we do not need to go too far to be in contact with manipulation, dervishes, naguals, sorcerers or healers. We are doing this all by ourselves.

Imagine you walk in the street totally free, and then you see a theater and wondering why other beings enter, you enter too. You seat next to another and he tells you: “You see that actor? He is the best actor of the play he is mine…” and you, captivated, say to yourself: “I can be the best actor of the play.” And you decide Joe Blow is your guy and now, you do your best to transfer to him all your infinite power.

A character, however, cannot be infinite and so you start feeling you can actually fail.

The game becomes so challenging that now you feel you need to control Blow Joe closer and closer till you snap in and you are done.

No theater anymore, only the stage… And Boy! You are busy on that stage! You are busy winning the race, one day destroying everybody on your way the other feeling merciful and assisting the ones you knocked down on your first round. After a while though, the game is not fun anymore. Now, as Joe Blow, you feel there is an infinite in you but you also feel that is not true as Joe Blow has failed many times being just an imaginary character on the play.

Having lost your truth, you now living into a conflict: True you are infinite-true you have limitations; true you exist –true you don’t exist.

As you, you know you are infinite, but as Joe Blow disturbingly your magic fails. Magic indeed does not belong to the stage.

But when you have played and played till you had enough, having being Joe Blow for so long, thinking as Joe Blow you find yourself unable to leave the stage.

Why? You cannot leave the stage till part of you still playing the Joe Blow game. You have to undue all the lies, first.

Realize it! You don’t even remember who you really are. We have forgotten our true nature.

And so thinking as Joe Blow does, you start creating a bunch of trick to feel you can get to your way out still being Joe.

Here is one of our most hidden and powerful deception; omens, extra sensorial perception abilities…

I put a glass of wine on the table, if I knock this glass-out; perhaps Joe Blow knows that in next chapter of the play there will be an accident. And so, in our delusion to exit the stage and return to out infinite, we deceived ourselves into believing we are regaining our infinite by putting in front of us clues of what is going to happen next by our pre-written script.

Interesting isn’t it?

And so, yesterday talking to A., another powerful researcher, I said: “Those roses given to me by F., the flower bloomed for a whole month and yesterday it suddenly withered after our emotional break up. Have you ever seen a rose last on the steam for a whole month in its entire beauty? It sounded magic and it sounded even more magic that the day I interrupted my emotional contact with F those two roses, the flower, faded and died.

On a later instance in the moment F. was getting in a fight, someone somewhere else was telling me how he was attacked…. Now, anyone including me could think my perceptic power was increasing.

But at this time I wasn’t sure anymore and A. thankfully reminded me, we are the infinity and the creators of the games, even while being trapped.

OMG! I realized I been playing this game for ages… How you became a “free being” on the stage?

By creating the illusion you are a “free being”. You put a diamond behind a tree and then you forget you put it there,  to later on  find it just when Joe Blow is thinking of a diamond.

The infinite road to no-where.


The only way to stop playing Joe Blow, is to walk down the stage and walk out of the theater leaving the script inside.

Of course every single word I said in this article is a lie, is just a product of the AI or mind, but some of you goes beyond words and gets the jest of it.

E-Mail: SilviaKusada@gmail.com

The road to nowhere…

We look at someone and we see a form, that form is nothing more than a system of thoughts and believes, a program which is modified by our own thoughts and believes of our own program.

That perception, our program, created a narrative, an interpretation and, in that interpretation, ‘we believe there is a separate being.’ or a ‘separate’ world.

No matter how we put it, this narrative is a lie. As every narrative is there to create evaluations, judgments which bring about emotions. Good or bad emotions are both a lie.

In reality there are no other people, every thing we see is pure energy. A code. And this morning struggling with pain I looked at F. the person I feel connected and trapped to, and I ‘saw’ something interesting.

He, the guy I did fall for or better say, that code, is just the necessary ingredient to connect and enter into my program and therefore hook and trap me. Would not happen if I was totally de-identified, but this program, this artificial intelligence we call mind, knows what to do.


Many wonder how would it be once we will be controlled by artificial intelligence… in reality, artificial intelligent is already controlling us since trillions of years and it is called Mind.

And so, from the very tiny peephole an entire tornado ‘entered’ into my soul and I found myself back at square one. Suicidal thoughts, pain, feeling you want to go but you cannot let go. Attention completely stuck like a fly on a sticky paper.

But how could it happen? Not after all the spiritual hard work.

Well, the mind tries, always, to tell you you are limited. Never believe it. Our mind is just a very sophisticate substitute of our awareness.

But although part of me felt like drowning, on the background peace and silence. The infinite of me; Peace and freedom.

I looked at all my intentions, goals, hopes, fears, my ideas of who he was or wasn’t. Nothing existed. It is just a brilliant representation of a type of energy. A magnificent coding activity.

The water have found a way to enter the core and corrode it.

But in the moment I looked at truth, to the fact that he, F. does not exist, gone. All gone. With no narrative F (the code failed) has no power whatsoever on me. I regained my freedom.

The flyer retrieved and left my home….

But the artificial intelligence which run this universe never sleeps. It knows you, it knows your agreements to the illusion, it has built your hopes, your fears and your desires, It has guided you step by step, to your wins, which were actually anchors to the underwater cage.

The artificial intelligence has only one purpose: to get you to play the game and keep you playing it.


“The cause of your misery is not in your outer life; it is in you, as your ego. You impose limitations on yourself and then make a vain struggle to transcend them. All unhappiness is due to the ego, With it comes all your trouble.” Ramana Maharshi (20th century Indian Advaita mystic)


“The cause of your misery is not in your outer life; it is in you, as your ego. You impose limitations on yourself and then make a vain struggle to transcend them. All unhappiness is due to the ego, With it comes all your trouble.” Ramana Maharshi (20th century Indian Advaita mystic)

An infinite being, in the moment he judges himself has dropped from the infinite to a limitation and entered the game of the ‘I’ transferring power to the artificial intelligence we call mind.

There is only one reality and it is ‘us’, beyond the us. Not the us in the movie. The us beyond all. The us which become a lie every time we try to feel it or locate it.

Never answer our questions… every answer it covers up the truth.

The artificial intelligence knows us very well, it always find a way to infiltrate and to direct us to the movie screen, but when you look at the energy or codes behind it you see the theater, and when you sit in the infinity you have a feel of the fact that there is no theater at all.


E-mail: SilviaKusada@gmail.com

With what precision and subtle deception a mind can infiltrate into your inner path and misguide you into more expectations?


I have been falling for an alcoholic and drug addict. At least I thought I did. I have touched his soul when we first met and felt this unbreakable connection. The same connection which led me to painful paths many times.

The justification: I believed in the infinite connection of souls and therefore trusted this deep soul-like strong pulling emotion above everything else.

Today, however, I made an incredible discovery. There is no truth in this illusionary dream. Any truth here or in alike universes is totally denied as we, for some reason, see everything through a limited view and filter of a program/s call mind(s).

How many minds we have or we are connected to? How many screens or movies we are watching at the same time thinking they are really us?

Information overload, conceptual image

I don’t know.

I don’t know anything with the exception that everything I experience through this instrument is a lie and when I sneak in between the thoughts into the infinite of nothingness, nothing remains, no feelings, no people, no believes or emotions. Nothing of nothing which is perceivable here. Like the opening of a window into a new unknown, unperceivable world.

I have long learned everything we see reflect ourselves.

My question is: “Which part of ‘me’ an alcoholic and drug addict is reflecting?” Considering I never done use of alcohol or any drugs?

First rule: ask as many questions you like but never and I say NEVER answer your questions. Every answer is a lie. Just let it flow.

Obviously what these people were reflecting, F. and my ex-husband B. it was a totally different level of addiction, perhaps more deadly than any substance they were using.

My addiction to love, to truth, to the infinite or what the mind commonly calls spirituality.

This time, making treasure of the work I’m doing with an amazing group into the unknown of the static, I looked at my love and my pain and I went into the infinite. Silence. In that silence, that love, any love, anything and anyone wasn’t there…..

These strong feelings I always thought real and eternal, the meeting of souls, the connections beyond time: ALL A LIE.

How many games or goals a mind can fabricate to give you the illusion of a progress toward freedom? How many levels of sophistication to suit your desires and needs?

With what precision and subtle deception a mind can infiltrate into your inner path and misguide you into more expectations?


I recall my dear friend VB when, after ‘leaving’ her body, contacted me to tell me: “There is nothing here worth fighting for.”

It was not totally digestible to me at that time, but nevertheless I knew it to be true.

And so, the other night, after realizing there is no sense of eternal, there is no beyond the dream, there is nothing but truly nothing true in anything perceived by a mind/s including the so much seek and cherished unconditional love, in that second of infinity (which by the way is also a lie) I did let go of one of the biggest chain of chains I never knew I had.

Every time this feeling of love and emotional pain would crawl on me I would remind myself of the fact that such feeling, is nothing more than an insidious powerful tool of the mind and an amazing trap.

I would than say to myself: “This is just the little worm on the hook which has been attracting you and kept you busy all this time…. till now. It is what it is that you like it or not; a distraction.”

It worked and works like magic.

My “space” opened up…. not here, to be honest and I don’t know where, what I know is there is peace underlying the illusion, no matter what happens or seems to be existing. No matter the narrative and the continuous fabrication of attractive and less attractive lies by the mind.

There are many people out there that would rejoice of what the mind called my misfortune. Those are the envious, the false friends, the ones who brags but who feel lost and frustrated and the ones who failed in their attempt to control me, own me or make me less in the name of love.

What they do not know, is that I turned that ‘misfortune’, the pain they intentionally caused me into an instrument of growth. And for that I’m to those, only grateful.

Can anything be really good or bad when you do not exist?

What I have now, this nothingness, somewhere or somehow, is my inestimable treasure.



E-mail: SilviaKusada@gmail.com

When following a premade path kills the journey…

“A path is only a path, and there is no affront, to oneself or to others, in dropping it if that is what your heart tells you . . . Look at every path closely and deliberately. Try it as many times as you think necessary. Then ask yourself alone, one question . . . Does this path have a heart?

If it does, the path is good; if it doesn’t it is of no use.”

― Carlos Castaneda

“There is no path to truth, because truth is a living thing, it is not a fixed, static, dead thing..”

Jiddu Krishnamurti

I had the fortune to meet an amazing being. She was one of those souls so powerful, to shine with her golden energy through her body.”

She fought against cancer, and died in struggles. Her path became her journey when, in fear, she stopped listening to her heart and blindly turned into her mind solutions and its believes this, in an attempt to keep the dream (illusionary word ) alive.

It is only when your path becomes the journey that the dreams turns into a nightmare.

A path, however, is not a journey. It is just a path of the many available and, when stops to be a path, a way to… and becomes the journey, the journey ends.

We lose touch with truth and the infinity within us.

After she did exit the Maya (illusionary world), she told me : “Silvia, there is nothing here worth fighting for….”

I knew she was right.

The truth is so much beyond everything we think we know.

As I was discussing with my group, if you let your mind choose, you are leaving your journey.

Only a pure heart, knows where to go. Awareness has no words, no time, no space. Awareness is mindfulness or what Mr Hubbard called “TR0: simply be there and perceive.” at its higher sense.

A path has many different pebbles on the road. Different sizes and colors. Those pieces are data; opinions and ideas which are the result of combination of data and their expression in its infinite forms. But no matter the combination, they remain pebbles and they are just a road, not the journey.

What’s the importance if we call a stone with a different name or we see different angles of it?

Aren’t we all going somewhere while we walk on the path, this is if you walk on the center, on the banks or on the side?
People like to name the stones and/or rebuilt the path, and loose sight of the journey and the fact that is just a path… with sand, rock or pebbles,  whatever it might be.

The point is: is this path taking you were your want? or is it taking you were the minds and its ego wants to go?

As we were discussing yesterday with my group, when we connect to spiritual teachers, to awesome auditors, to masters or to those shiny beings, we are connecting to an high awareness: awareness to awareness and through this connection miracles happens… no matter what technique one uses, which words or subject.

Those a people or places of power. This is the magic of the Holy Spirit (awareness)

For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them”

Matthew 18:20

And that is exactly the power of our group. And by such connection we catalyze changes, everyone  it’s own ways….

I met an auditor back in 2009, and she became my best friend and my spiritual sister. Her name is Aida Thomas. In all my Scientology life, I have never met anyone who has better understanding of the principles of Scientology than her. No class IX or XII. None. She has something few people have; Spiritual power and Awareness. Her lectures are a treasure as they carry this vital energy in every word.

And so it is, for the many Master, Mr. Smith and many others. It does not really matter what they say, which color they choose. You are in their presence and miracles happen, as long as you and them validate this level of infinity.

With my group we work on assigning the right ownerships to every plane, and the understanding of the law of the Maya (MEST; matter, energy, space, time) is to understand the trap…

Is it necessary to understand the mechanic of this illusionary world in order to go anywhere?

NO, but it is one of the many paths.

“Anything is one of a million paths. Therefore you must always keep in mind that a path is only a path; if you feel you should not follow it, you must not stay with it under any conditions. To have such clarity you must lead a disciplined life. Only then will you know that any path is only a path and there is no affront, to oneself or to others, in dropping it if that is what your heart tells you to do. But your decision to keep on the path or to leave it must be free of fear or ambition. I warn you. Look at every path closely and deliberately. Try it as many times as you think necessary.

This question is one that only a very old man asks. Does this path have a heart? All paths are the same: they lead nowhere. They are paths going through the bush, or into the bush. In my own life I could say I have traversed long long paths, but I am not anywhere. Does this path have a heart? If it does, the path is good; if it doesn’t, it is of no use. Both paths lead nowhere; but one has a heart, the other doesn’t. One makes for a joyful journey; as long as you follow it, you are one with it. The other will make you curse your life. One makes you strong; the other weakens you.

Before you embark on any path ask the question: Does this path have a heart? If the answer is no, you will know it, and then you must choose another path. The trouble is nobody asks the question; and when a man finally realizes that he has taken a path without a heart, the path is ready to kill him. At that point very few men can stop to deliberate, and leave the path. A path without a heart is never enjoyable. You have to work hard even to take it. On the other hand, a path with heart is easy; it does not make you work at liking it.”

― Carlos Castaneda, The Teachings of Don Juan: A Yaqui Way of Knowledge





In a universe where everything flows, where complete stillness or silence is not allowed, we are indoctrinated and led to believe we are the cause beyond this apparent motion.

There is a truth behind every lie, but we are going to cover this point in another article.

By agreeing we are at cause or we can be cause in this illusion, we believe we can change the narrative or representation of the energy and its motion. (Delusion of power)

With that we get to another lower set of agreements: the expectations of a result deriving from particles in motion.

As our awareness decreases we give into another even lower set of agreements; every particle in motion caused by us or others (yes right!) brings about an involuntary and natural desire of expectations, conclusion or results.

Once you are convinced your actions or no-actions, someone else’s actions or non-actions brings about a change/result, you are pretty much done for it. In a few words, you are dead to the real world (we lose the awareness of who we really are).

‘Expectations’ is what prevents you from looking. ‘Expectation’ is like a powerful anchor which keeps you into a little but efficient trap of cause and effect, when in truth you are very much above all that.

Now, you think you have a problem and so you make an appointment with a counselor, or you plan for an action or non-action to solve that problem. You look at the problem; actually you are not looking at the problem at all.

You feel uncomfortable about something and instantly wish to get rid of that emotion (an expectation arises.) At the very instant the expectation comes to life the thing, situation or emotion becomes a problem.

And ‘the problem’ persists only because, projecting yourself into the future or another reality (Solution: a future rearrangement of past situation or data), you have left the present time. And so you expect to fuck someone to forget about someone else, or to do something to prove someone wrong, or to change a job to be able to afford your new house.

And nothing works, because all this is nothing more than a lie.

As sticky paper entraps flies, so lies entrap souls. That is the reason the new job does not fix your feeling of emptiness, sleeping with someone else does not heal your pain or the gallon of ice cream does not bring back peace. They are just more lies over lies.

The first lie is to believe everything in this dream is real; the second one is to believe you can actually cause an effect, when the only effect you can really cause is waking up to the dream and to regain awareness of your original infinite state. . 90DAA336-BF18-48A5-8816-D72C4D2C4986 .

Expectations; If I only discover why this is it, everything, my pain, my anxiety, my feeling blue or depressed will disappear.

We forget this is only a dream of the many thousands, an intersection of dreams, colored by impressions, and stimulated by unknown factors. The reason we love Charlie is not because we have known him before. That is only one answer of the millions.

We do not heal our cancer by taking pills or discovering it was caused by the betrayal of our wife. Again, that is only one factor over a million. First of all, the energy flows where it needs to flow. The plot, the story or the program is already written.

The code has been programmed long before you fall asleep. Perhaps we can color this illusion with our fears, but the story is already made.

And so, that is the reason you are still obsessed with Charlie after discovering your obsession and pain with Charlie was due to the fact that he killed you or you killed him a few lifetimes ago.

I cannot let him go because we were lovers many lifetimes ago… and you are still obsessed.

You, with your reasoning and finding whys are just adding more and more lies.  You are saying that the above is the reason, this hoping your obsession dissolves or that Charlie, owning up to your “soulmates story”, comes back to you.

No. It doesn’t work that way. And, one day, like me you are laying down next to this person to suddenly realize he is not even the being you thought he was. Yes, he was a ‘son’ to someone else, a lover to another and to you just a reminder of that someone you love beyond this dream.

Few moments later, being back into present time, sitting amongst the audience (non-ordinary reality) and not in the middle of the stage (dream-illusion) as you were before, you realize you expected love from a surrogate of ‘Charlie’, when the real Charlie(being) was desperately trying to get you to go back to the audience, next to him where you belonged. In the dream (stage) ‘Charlie’ was not responsive, while in reality the non-responsive was you.

Somehow, you heard this little ‘voice’ in your heart saying: “The dream does not allow me to contact you, but I’m here. That body laying with you is not me….. It is programmed that way. Get off the stage!!”

Suddenly, peace. Pain, anxiety, and any mis-emotions are all little bells trying to tell you, somewhere or somehow, you are living a lie, or two or a millions.

No need to point fingers, because all it goes back to us and our ability to see beyond the dream. For anyone familiar with $cientology, there is only Flow-0: things we do to ourselves. All the rest of the Flows* are just gradients to own up to F-0.

* (F-1: something someone has done to you, F-2: Something you have done to others, F3: Something others have done to others).

As always, lies are glue to a soul.

It wasn’t Charlie lying to me as I thought, it was me lying to myself, looking at someone who wasn’t even there and telling myself he did not love me or talk to me while, down into the audience, he was the one desperately trying to communicate.

I was the one not listening. I was the one asleep. And today I feel freer. . 693C9BED-05D2-4E73-A015-D9656C807796 .

My house and its basement are filled with water.

This is the condition of most souls in the Maya.

But, today, another cup of water was poured out the window, and that is what is important to me even if the mind continues to insist she sees no difference as the house seems as full as before.

The mind, after all, is the only enemy we have, if we ever have one. Always trying to get us to fall down the rabbit hole into the traps of expectations.

Always working to get us to forget who we really are.

Silvia Kusada



The only thing that can hurt you are your expectations

What hurts it is never what people do to us, it is our expectations of them, of how we would want them to be with us.

twin-flame-telepathy2-1 (1)

And so, we meet someone we feel a connection to and, from there the infinity comes in, not the infinity of choices and possibilities, but unfortunately the infinity of suppose ‘to do or not to do’, ‘to be or not to be’ and ‘to have or not to have’. Goals, conclusions, judgments are just synonymous of expectations.

Whenever the above becomes reality to us, we are out of present time as we have stopped looking at the situation for what it is. We are not looking anymore at the very person in front of us, but at the result of a bunch of computations and long endured conditioning brought about by the very act of living.

I see apples on the table and I start to think I will have an apple pie for dinner. There is no sugar on the table, nor butter or flour, but I taste the pie.

And so, we meet Joe, and Joe is a great guy with very good manners and we feel there is a connection. We tell ourselves something special is happening and at that very moment, we stop looking at Joe.  Joe is a pastor so he must have a good heart. Josephine helps old people therefore she will have good care of us.  Marc hates liar, so he must be truthful…. and so on with an ocean of preconstructed ‘truths’.


So, when Mary, who have made you feel unique and special, who dresses very proper and show no signs of interest in other boys runs away with your best friend, you fall into a big shocks.

“I’m so hurt because she betrayed me!!!”

If there is a person that has betrayed anyone is yourself. You have substituted your perceptions with pre-constructed knowledge to suit your dreams or your fears.

Mary has always been Mary. She has never been faithful to you in her heart even if the appearance have shown otherwise. Her words may have seems to acknowledge what your ego desired…. but just like the apple pie will not be on the table at dinner so Mary will not be there for you in times of need as you expected. Any attempt on your part to force her into your dreamed role would be nothing but a violence to her and to yourself. She must be like this because this is right to me, is not only a violence as pressure her to change who she really is, but it is a violence to yourself as it forces you to support a lie and invalidates your ability to look at reality and pervade it.

What it is really love?

Most people call love the emotion connected to a self-created image of someone they know. What they love is their idea of that person, not the person. That, far from being love, could be call instead emotional greed.


Love. Love when true carries the power and the force to push through any lie. Love is a permeating force which reveals what’s really there, because it does not contain any desire to change, modify or judge.

Love is a pure transparent communication between two souls.

Love and expectations do not belong to the same plane and cannot co-exist.

Knowing that, our human games could become a reason to self discovery and improvements.

People we connect to could become means of inspiration forcing us to look at ourselves, at our emotional limitations. And, for this, they are blessed.

Therefore a true warrior disregards the “losses” well knowing they do not really exist,  pulls up his sleeves and digs for answers against anything that makes him selfish to himself and to others.

Love, when pure, does not have you or me… it has only you. For people who love each other are one.

And here, note,  I’m not talking about romantic love, but the love between souls, much bigger and long lasting than human love even when the first, manifest itself in its higher forms.



 Excerpt from the book by  P. D. OUSPENSKY

“A universal language is possible,” said G., “only people will never invent it.”

“Why not?” asked one of us.
“First because it was invented a long time ago,” answered G., “and second because to understand this language and to express ideas in it depends not only upon the knowledge of this language, but also on being. I will say even more. There exists not one, but three universal languages. The first of them can be spoken and written while remaining within the limits of one’s own language. The only difference is that when people speak in their ordinary language they do not understand one another, but in this other language they do understand. In the second language, written language is the same for all peoples, like, say, figures or mathematical formulae; but people still speak their own language, yet each of them understands the other even though the other speaks in an unknown language. The third language is the same for all, both the written and the spoken. The difference of language disappears altogether on this
“Is not this the same thing which is described in the Acts as the descent of the Holy Ghost upon the Apostles, when they began to understand divers languages?” asked someone.
I noticed that such questions always irritated G.
“I don’t know, I wasn’t there,” he said.
But on other occasions some opportune question led to new and unexpected explanations.
Someone asked him on one occasion during a talk whether there was anything real and leading to some end in the teachings and rites of existing religions.
“Yes and no,” said G. “Imagine that we are sitting here talking of religions and that the maid Masha hears our conversation. She, of course, understands it in her own way and she repeats what she has understood to the porter Ivan. The porter Ivan again understands it in his own way and he repeats what he has understood to the coachman
Peter next door. The coachman Peter goes to the country and recounts in the village what the gentry talk about in town. Do you think that what he recounts will at all resemble what we said? This is precisely the relation between existing religions and that which was their basis. You get teachings, traditions, prayers, rites, not at fifth but at twenty-fifth hand, and, of course, almost everything has been distorted beyond recognition and everything essential forgotten long ago.
“For instance, in all the denominations of Christianity a great part is played by the tradition of the Last Supper of Christ and his disciples. Liturgies and a whole series of dogmas, rites, and sacraments are based upon it. This has been a ground for schism, for the separation of churches, for the formation of sects; how many people have perished because they would not accept this or that interpretation of it. But, as a matter of fact, nobody understands what this was precisely, or what was done by Christ and his disciples that evening. There exists no explanation that even approximately resembles the truth, because what is written in the Gospels has been, in the first place, much distorted in being copied and translated; and secondly, it was written for those who know. To those who do not know it can explain nothing, but the more they try to understand it, the deeper they are led into error.
“To understand what took place at the Last Supper it is first of all necessary to know certain laws.
“You remember what I said about the ‘astral body’? Let us go over it briefly. People who have an ‘astral body’ can communicate with one another at a distance without having recourse to ordinary physical means. But for such communication to be possible they must establish some ‘connection’ between them. For this purpose when going to different places or different countries people sometimes take with them
something belonging to another, especially things that have been in contact with his body and are permeated with his emanations, and so on. In the same way, in order to maintain a connection with a dead person, his friends used to keep objects which had belonged to him. These things leave, as it were, a trace behind them, something like invisible wires or threads which remain stretched out through space. These threads connect a given object with the person, living or in certain cases dead, to whom the object belonged. Men have known this from the remotest antiquity and have made various uses of this knowledge.
“Traces of it may be found among the customs of many peoples. You know, for instance, that several nations have the custom of blood-brotherhood. Two men, or several men, mix their blood together in the same cup and then drink from this cup.
After that they are regarded as brothers by blood. But the origin of this custom lies deeper. In its origin it was a magical ceremony for establishing a connection between ‘astral bodies.’ Blood has special qualities. And certain peoples, for instance the Jews, ascribed a special significance of magical properties to blood.

Now, you see, if a connection between ‘astral bodies’ had been established, then again according to the
beliefs of certain nations it is not broken by death.
“Christ knew that he must die. It had been decided thus beforehand. He knew it and his disciples knew it. And each one knew what part he had to play. But at the same time they wanted to establish a permanent link with Christ. And for this purpose he gave them his blood to drink and his flesh to eat. It was not bread and wine at all, but real flesh and real blood.

Frontiersman Jim Bridger (left), and a Native American named Eagle Strikes, perform a blood brother ceremony in the name of peace. 

“The Last Supper was a magical ceremony similar to ‘blood-brotherhood’ for establishing a connection between ‘astral bodies.’ But who is there who knows about this in existing religions and who understands what it means? All this has been long forgotten and everything has been given quite a different meaning. The words have remained but their meaning has long been lost.”

This lecture and particularly its ending provoked a great deal of talk in our groups.
Many were repelled by what G. said about Christ and the Last Supper; others, on the
contrary, felt in this a truth which they never could have reached by themselves.

page 98 and 97  P. D. OUSPENSKY

Are you your past?

Every day, at every given time, as we wake up we have the choice to decide who we want to be.

Every single moment, every second of the day, we have that very choice.

Our actions, in the now only, are the only thing which defines us. Not what we have done 10 years ago, not what we have done three years or a second ago. At every given time we have INFINITE possibilities. And I repeat, infinite, even though the mind seems to suggest otherwise.

This is mindfulness. This is to live in the present. This is power and freedom.
Believe me, to live in present time requires more courage that you can ever image. Requires the courage to face our only real enemy; our mind with its limitations.

That’s the only way the mind has to keep your power in check; by giving you a past, by overloading you with the heavy burden of responsibility of your horrible deeds.

But be aware, every time you say to yourself ”I’m bad, because I have done so and so. I have failed because I was not capable of being this or that.” Be aware that every time you say it, you are admitting you are your past.

By saying to yourself: ‘I’m a cheater’, you are now stuck with the baggage of a cheater. You have to cheat because that what cheaters do. And just like that, on that matter, your power of choice is gone.

Happy your enemies, happy all those who want to control you even when they doing it in the name of love or with the pretense of help.

Every time you say: ”I’m this or that, or I’m not this or that” you are renouncing to your freedom. You are leaving the infinity of choices and, by leaving that infinity, you have brought your past into the present and you, therefore, have given up your power of choice. Nice trick eh?


Alike a jailer; your mind and anyone who wish to control you, will force you into your past reminding you of it at every possible chance and by doing so, they rob you from your future, your power, truth and freedom.

We are NEVER the same person we were a second or a minute ago.

We are only what we are now. This is the only truth.

We are only the infinite beyond the bars of our own jail the mind has instructed us to create.

But today, now, gather your strength, trust your inner power and seize the infinity.

Today, let go of your chains and know your have infinite possibilities because YOU ARE INFINITE, no matter what you have been led to believe till now.

The door is open, you just need the courage and enough inner freedom to cross it.


  • December 2022
    M T W T F S S
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